Rick Perry Appointment Screws Texas Again; No Honor In Goat Dealie


So. America gets another chance to witness the businesslike ways of Texas Governor Rick “Let’s Create A New Agency So I can Give My College Roommate An Executive Job” Perry. A little background.

Luminant Energy (LE), a subsidiary of Energy Futures Holdings, has been center stage in what I’ll call Governor Rick Perry’s Great Anti-EPA Crusade. See, LE is an electric company that makes its living producing energy from old fashioned, dirty coal-fired plants. You know those plants—the ones with the giant smokestacks that belch continuous, ominous streams of burned-coal pollution twenty-four hours and three-sixty-five. The same kinds of coal-fired plants you see in any movie or TV show or video where the director wants you to get a sense and feel of pollution, economic decay and desperation.

Those kinds of coal-fired plants.

The US EPA has long identified those plants as major sources of pollution and targeted them to be either cleaned up, or closed. Countrywide, state environmental agencies have forced new “scrubbed discharge” emissions be added to those plants or they shut down. States everywhere have complied with the Clean Air Act in efforts to protect their citizens and their environments.

Except, of course, for Texas. Nope, folks, you see we do things our own way down here to Texas. Our governor, Caesar and Jesus-appointed leader, Rick the Prick Perry, doesn’t think there is any such a thing as pollution. To semi-quote the Prickster, “Pollution is just another one of those “lution” words, like evolution and convolution. And evolution don’t exist.”

That wasn’t an actual quote but rather my interpretation of the facts.

Because of the governor’s efforts to assist Future Energy Holdings’ LE and others like it, the EPA has seized control of our environmental controls from the air quality perspective. Because Governor Perry forced lax air quality standards onto our state environmental agency, the TCEQ, we have moved into the spot as number-one worst air quality state. An honorable position in our Governor’s eyes.

Next, the Texas Department of Transportation (TxDOT) is our state’s company-owned engineering firm. Responsible for designing, constructing and maintaining our roads and bridges since 1917, TxDOT has been an agency that is all about the engineers. Why would that be? Why would we want engineers running the government agency that performs the State’s most important engineering functions?

Maybe the most obvious reason is safety. Personally, I want a structural expert—one who understands all the dynamics of stress and flex and all of that silly physics shit—to sit in judgment when approving the plans for my roads and bridges. I really do not want some bean counter to have the final say as to whether the 200-foot tall concrete flyover I drive to get onto IH-35 will be built to either 200% safety or 65% safety engineering.

And the last person I want to run my TxDOT would be a fucking political aide and lobbyist for the energy giant Energy Future Holdings and Luminant Energy, who has similar ideologies as Perry. I cannot even imagine that a man who spent fifteen years under the coattails of Senator Phil Gramm and Governor Perry would be named to succeed an engineer with 33-years at TxDOT, a professional engineer who worked his way through the ranks to the top spot.

But guess what, folks. Perry just named Phil Wilson, his and Senator Gramm’s former aide and current LE and Future Energy lobbyist, as the head of TxDOT. Thaaaaaat’s right, we just replaced a professional engineer—Amadeo Saenz, a 33-year TxDOT veteran, with this shitball.


Oh, and it gets better. Rick Perry has based his Presidential rhetoric on a foundation of his smart business acumen, how he saves money by cutting non-essentials (like medical services and education), and how he doesn’t waste a dime of state funds.

Guess what. Professional engineer Saenz was paid $190,000/year for his 33-years of specific, dedicated experience—a fine salary for an experienced profession. Phil Wilson, a fine Christian man with zero specific experience either as an engineer or in management nor did he even work any construction jobs as a kid, is making $292,500 per year.

Holy, fucking shit! Is he serious? Which reminds me. Why don’t we have an exclamation mark for the question mark—you know like the exclamation point is for the period?

Folks, that extra $102,500 of salary is enough wasted money to buy 205,000 meals for hungry people! You can imagine my consternation.

But I can take solace in this one dealie. Engineer Saenz made his decisions solely based upon sound scientific principles. When he approved the 200-foot flyover my car sits atop at 55-MPH, all I had was the solid confidence I would make it down as planned and continue my drive up to Dallas because it was engineered to provide that assurance.

But with Phil Wilson in charge, I don’t need no fucking science for my flyover because old Philly has something waaaay better. Yep, I know that Mr. Wilson is gonna pray to Jesus and have his Lord and Saviour protect me.

Ugga-mugga-fugga UGH!

Thankfully, it’s Saturday and college football day. Carta Blanca beer, catching up on my bloggie reading and a bar B Que’d goat are on today’s agenda. Which reminds me. Honor the cat was pretty funny last night. When we were sitting at dinner discussing tonight’s dinner, she wanted to know if she could have the honor of hunting down the goat. I told her, “Sure, little lady, we’ll go hunting in the morning.”

We’re headed to the neighbor’s place, he’s the goat farmer. Manana, y’all.

Print Friendly

6 Responses to “Rick Perry Appointment Screws Texas Again; No Honor In Goat Dealie”

  1. bj says:

    Ya’lls all gotta REAL winner in Goobernur Goodhair there Mooner! When Gov. Dolph Briscoe(a Democrat) appointed Mr. Saenz 33 years ago he was more interested in puttin’ the RIGHTguy in that position. I saw a photo of Amadeo Saenz Jr. and looks like to me he’s Chicano …. Goobernur Goodhair thought they told him to appoint ” The WHITE Guy’ to that position. But don’t begrudge that Wilson dood all the extry money …. he’s got REAL connections to ‘Murkan Jezus …. the beaner guy was only using Science! If I’uz you …. I’d stay on the flat roads from here on out …. and away from bridges, flyovers, viaducts and shit.
    If Honor bags that goat …. holla atta brutha …. I love me some Goat-in-the-ground …. almost as much as Pig-in-th-ground!

  2. bj says:

    Oh Yeah ….. and …. FUCK Prick Perry! I read about the $135 MILLION REFUND he’s givin’ to Oil Refineries insted of to schools, firefighters and shit. Or at least his “Appointees” are giving it … in his name …
    “”Gov. Perry appoints individuals who are qualified and willing to serve, and expects they will consider all of the facts and make the appropriate decision,” said Lucy Nashed, a spokeswoman for Perry.”


  3. BJ. As usual you’ve managed to boil all of the bullshit down to it’s inky-stinky essence. Rick Perry is ruining my state and not in dribs and drabs. He’s laying our arteries open and bleeding us out worse than old George Washington got bled. And it killed Georgie.

    Also, are you not a touch presumptuous to quote Vermont Law School? How can our detractors call us stilted if you do that shit?

    As for the goat, honor lost the battle but won the war. The goat suffered a scratched nose and bloody forearms and she still looks like she saw a ghost. Didn’t get hurt but scared the shit out of her. Goat’s stuffed with herbs, onions and garlic, jalapeno peppers, and he’s slathered with Mooner’s dry rub special. The spit awaits!

  4. Q says:

    That is flat-out scary. So, not only do you have a rookie building bridges, you’re paying him more money to do so. Why can’t voters see this? Why do they blindly go to the polls not knowing anything about where their money is going? It’s so idiotic!

  5. admin says:

    TQ. I think the comedian Ron White said it best. Because they are, “Soooo-oo-oo damned stoooo-oo-oooooo-pii-iiiiiiiiid.”

    But don’t forget that this is the same Rick Perry who opposed stem cell research but then quietly had stem cell therapy to treat his sore back. He justifies the two-faced actions by saying that he used his own stem cells, true, a mitgating factor. But it’s like everything with our governor–he’s on his own side of every issue. And his own side can change.

  6. Squatty says:

    It’s so nice to drop by this blobber of yours and read comments posted by folks other than me, Reckem, and Streaker Jones. You might be drawing a crowd, Mooner! These political rants are becoming infamous…

Leave a Reply