Why I don’t Own A Handgun; I Am, However, Shopping For A Nuke


So. I don’t know if you guys have been keeping up with events over to Iran. If you have, you know that the conservative religious factions puppeted by the one, the only—the O-fucking-riginal—Ayatollah Khomeini—have gained control of government. The conservatives lost much of their power over the last decade and a more moderate have emerged, assuming you can say that any Muslim extremist is more “moderate” than another, and their current President has shown to be the most moderate of them all.

It has been this moderate President from among all of those conservative right-wing religious zealots who has given the rest of us a thin shred of hope that things will approach stability in that region. When combined with the Arab Spring movements, the moderation of the extreme conservative pogrom-based inclinations in Iran have been heartening for those of us seeking some limited vision of world peace.

But, and alas, the arch conservatives have won a contentious dogfight for control of Iran’s central government, an action that has, effectively, granted the Ayatollah total fucking control. That batshit crazy shitball will now be making decisions about Iran’s pursuit of a nuclear bomb, pursuits to infiltrate America’s borders to reign terror, and put Iranian women back into conservative garb and stuff their semi-Westernized asses back into the rear seats on society’s bus.

As the extreme tenants of conservative Muslim control eased over the last ten years, Iran could have been almost looked at as a model for how to change an autocratic, religious-based oppressive society into a more civilized one. By lessening the conservatives Koran-based ideologies and letting people enjoy increasing freedoms of choice, Iran’s economy improved and the standard of living enjoyed a remarkable up-tick.

Iran’s increasing moderation away from conservative religious fundamentalism had an interesting, and to me amazing, side benefit. A never-before-seen middle class began to form and emerge from the abject poverty. Abject poverty was the norm for typical Iranian citizens under the Shaw, as he and his family and a few chosen buddies controlled the huge share of Iran’s wealth and privilege. Iranian society was controlled by extremes—mega wealth and abject poverty.

When the Shaw was ousted, the only thing that really changed at first was that the Shaw and friends were replaced by the conservative religious clerics. Those assholes took control of the power and wealth and the common citizens remained the poor masses.

But things were getting better for everyone in Iran until now, with this recent conservative party win.

Is this shit funny yet? Has anybody reading this mess gotten a glimpse at where I’m going here?

Let me say it this way. Change the word “Iran” and replace it with America. Change Muslim for Christian and trade your Bible for the Koran.

But you don’t need to change the words “conservative” or “right-wing” or “autocratic” or “fuckwad” or “middle class” to get my drifts. And you don’t need to be a genius to see that America’s right-wing religious conservatives are trying to do the same thing here as what happened in Iran. Hell, Prick Santoria and Mitt The Schmidt Romney look at Iran with stars twinkling in their eyes.

Wake… The Fuck Up, America. There isn’t one degree of separation between the Ayatollah and his henchmen and America’s conservative Christians. They each want absolute power to rule lives based upon their personal religion. They want women put back in their proper place and they want to take America back to times where it was “Great”.

Mitt Romney is a fucking Robber Baron, folks, and Rick Santorum thinks Senator Joe McCarthy was a liberal. Mitt wants to return to the times when the foundations of America’s wealth were built on the skeletons of its burned-out workers. Rick Santorum actually said that he wants religion to rule government.

He actually said it. Are you not pissed and angry and really fucking scared that a major contender for President has publicly stated that he wants to overrule the Constitution? He said he wants gay people in their place. Do you know what he’s actually saying there?

Ugh. It turns my stomach to think that one of those two asswipes could be my President.

Fuck it. I’m going fishing. Manana, y’all.

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4 Responses to “Why I don’t Own A Handgun; I Am, However, Shopping For A Nuke”

  1. squatlo says:

    The Shaw? Artie or Robert?

    On a completely serious note (or as serious as I can get on this blog) the people of Iran are probably the best educated and most westernized of any country in the region. They despise the clowns running things in their country as much as we despise the clowns who want to take over in THIS country, but guns and holy books rule and talkers drool. Like the old blues standard says, “Them that’s got shall get, them that’s not shall lose, so the Bible says and it still is news…”

    What’s amazing to me is that a large percentage of our population hasn’t been satisfied by the feast of bloodshed and misery we’ve brought to that part of the world, and still hungers (!) for a war with Iran or Syria or both. It’s almost as if our concensus of opinion now says “the only way we can influence events in other parts of the world is through brute force.” Which is probably why the same people think beating down dissent in this country is a viable option… they thrive when the strong get their way, and they feel oppressed when the weak and downtrodden have a voice in things.
    That might be another example of why the religious fuckballs in Iran and America are so much alike… they both want total control over others because giving others a voice is some sort of appeasement they can’t handle.

    Fuck Coca Cola. I’d like to teach the world to smoke. If everyone currently yelling for war in this country (or carrying an AK-47 in that one) would just stop and inhale, deeply, maybe twice a day? No more aggression, no more war, no more bomb-making, no more crazy talk about invasions and Great Satans.
    Of course, there would be a worldwide Doritos shortage, but like they say in the commercials, “Eat all you want. We’ll make more!”

  2. admin says:

    Squat. Yeppers, I’m thinking a little smoke, some magic mushrooms and regular group sex would benefit the entire world. And Cheetos. The original crunchy ones. And beer and pig meat too.

  3. chrisinphx says:

    The thing that scares me most is how many people aren’t bothered by the hate and non sense falling out of these douche nozzle’s mouths. Flew into IL last night for a week at home with the parents an my Mom and I start talking politics and holy shit…my own mother is border line “one of them!” She hate’s Obama for nothing more than being half black and honestly thinks he hasn’t accomplished one single positive thing, that the fucked economy is all because of him. If I wasn’t the spitting image of my father I would swear I was switched at birth.

  4. Chris. I understand the switched feelings. One of life’s great ironies might be that our parents can be our foils. I wish I could say my mother is borderline. I don’t mean the clinical diagnosis but as you say. Mother has both feet clearly outside the three point line.

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