Squat. I’d want to resurect Freddy Mercury for the part, and Lizzy Taylor for Remarks.

Let me provide a good illustration showing exactly what I’m talking about with that…

And questions that might help define the differences between organized religions are a lot like questions to define the differences between various children’s imaginary friends. Only we try to discourage imaginary friends when our kids show up with them, while simultaneously indoctrinating them to accept the concept of “Holy Ghosts” (“No, Jimmy, it’s not an episode of Scooby Doo”) or trying to convince them Santa flies around the world on Xmas Eve delivering presents to good girls and boys, even if they don’t have chimneys and have behaved like spoiled heathens most of their lives. If you’ve been brought up to accept A)The Easter Bunny (and all the goodies THAT rabbit can bring!), B) The Tooth Fairy (who seems to want to provide an incentive for kids to remove their bicuspids), C) Santa Clause (the reason for the season, after all) and then discover each and every one of THOSE imaginary visitors were complete bullshit passed down from generation to generation… well, it shouldn’t be hard to figure out why kids are skeptical of this Jesus fellow.

That was exactly why I, as an angelic little altar boy, came to doubt the pomp and circumstance of the Church and Mass and all of the other bullshit I was hearing. In fact, discovering that my parents (and everyone else’s fucking parents!) had been shooting us full of bullshit since birth pretty much convinced me nothing any adult told me was to be believed whole cloth. So I flipped off my algebra teachers, ignored the periodic table in chemistry class, and practiced creative math and spelling whenever possible.

Had my parents given me the straight scoop from birth onward, I probably would be a well-educated, thoughtful, erudite individual capable of helping confused Mooners understand the Catholic Church, instead of being the sarcastic and dull man I’ve become.

This is all the fault of those who sought to deceive us as children. And damned if I didn’t do the same shit to my own kids! Which explains why they’re sarcastic and suspicious, too…

I’m outta here.

Beej. After spending three day in research, I wish I’d called you first. I have a little more to say maybe later today. As you said, organized religion is all about control.

Granny. It’s a hollow win, G-OK, a hollow, hollow win.

It’s amazing how confusing a story gets when a succession of pious old farts spend 2,000 years fucking with it. Don’t read what I posted today. It’ll drive you nuts.

It sometimes bothers me when people tune in from cyberspace and have no idea who I’m ranting about over on my blog, despite the fact that some of my rantings are directed at the same assholes week after week. But I figure they’ll either know who I’m talking about or bother to find out, or they won’t. I probably wouldn’t. I have the attention span of a dying fruit fly these daze…

Hang in there.

Squat. OK, first, you are starting to whine again, and second, you aren’t the first nor last, to say that the Catholics will ignore. Please allow me to say this, Mr. Christian Gonzales. Before you blow me off, go ask Catholic anti-abortion lady if I can be ignored without making a payment?

Beej. Dixie speaks Latin, so rest assured. Then again, Dixie hasn’t been speaking to me since before Christmas, and remind me that we should take flowers and a nice box of candy on our next visit to Chez Squatlo.

Granny. I’ll keep you informed. So far, no official response.

My mother took all us kiddies to mass and Sunday school regular up till about the time I was 9. From what little I can remember about the confusing garbage the nuns fed us, the Pope, as the spiritual descendant of Peter, can issue edicts that have the force of scripture, because he can never be wrong when he is speaking for the church. (Infallibility, baby!) In other words, any random prejudice that dribbles out of the mouth of a senile pope is equivalent to the word of God.

It will be interesting, tho, to see what the Vasquez fella sez.

and Squatty …. was that “Full Grown Manly Men” comment a SHOT? Sounded like a shot at manly men, to me …. my compliments to yer Missus and please convey my apologies TO her for any trespasses, real or imagined. (gulp!)